For too long we have suffered under the delusion that the “spirit of the season” is sweetness and love. Truth is, nowadays it’s bitterness and hate! So here’s a seasonal song to fit our times:
Deck the next guy who says “Happy holidays!”
Hum-hum-hum-hum hum-hum-humbug!
Tis the season to argue ‘bout Santa’s race!
Hum-hum-hum-hum hum-hum-humbug!
Shop while you gripe that it’s too commercial!
Hum-hum-hum hum-hum-hum hum-hum-humbug!
Everything’s now controversial!
Hum-hum-hum-hum hum-hum-humbug!
We shouldn’t help the less fortunate anymore
Hum-hum-hum-hum hum-hum-humbug!
Charity just makes them want to stay poor
Hum-hum-hum-hum hum-hum-humbug!
It’s the rich to whom we should cater
Hum-hum-hum hum-hum-hum hum-hum-humbug!
‘Cause Ebeneezer Scrooge was a job creator!
Hum-hum-hum-hum hum-hum-humbug!
